Between Light and Darkness
by Ratt-San
Summary: A re-take on Stage 4 from Hiwatari-kun's POV. Hiwatari's thoughts on Daisuke and the real reason he left. SHOUNEN-Ai! HiwDai suggestions.


29 March. 2004

BETWEEN LIGHT AND DARKNESS

Retake on Stage 4

Hiwatari's POV

_DISCLAIMER: This anime and its characters in no way belong to me and that's why they're still straight!_

_WARNING: This ficlet contains SHOUNEN-AI material, this means BOY x BOY feelings, if you don't like this sort of thing please don't read, unless of course your curious. It's not much, just floating thoughts and implications._

The morning sunlight streamed in through my window as I lay in bed, the white sheets pulled up around my slim form. He'd almost come out this time, if I wasn't careful my control would slip and if that happened...Ah it was so troublesome. Flashing light caught my eye and I glared down at the cell phone, knowing what it was even before I picked it up. Very troublesome.

I arrived early and he threw his arms around me, but there was no warmth in the embrace and I coldly brushed him away. Oto-sama, sometimes I wonder if there wasn't a time when he was different, kinder, but I can't seem to remember so I don't bother debating it. He rattles on about the case, prods me with questions, but I have already learned ways to deflect such inquiries and he doesn't push. I leave quickly.

My arrival at school is as usual, uneventful, until I reach the hall near my class. That's when he appears, "Daijoubu?" I'm startled, I'll admit. Not many people ask me that and none of them ask out of genuine concern, none but him, Daisuke. I almost laugh to myself, Daisuke could never be anything but genuine. "Why?" He smiles a bit nervously, "Ah, well you've been looking terrible lately so...but I'm glad your better!" Another genki smile. "Let's hurry, or we'll be late for class." He emphasizes this by running ahead, only to fall flat on his face, but he still smiles. I follow at a slower pace. Why does he always seem to care? I've often wondered about that, but then again he worries about everyone. Why not his own enemy? I don't notice the girls who walk up to me and when they speak I don't even look, not taking my eyes off the retreating redhead's form. A love letter? I don't have time for such things. My eyes are still on him as he turns the corner and I walk away, not even noticing the people behind me. No, it's not only that I don't have time, but also what else is there to say? It's better to shoot down their hopes early, rather than lead them on, lead them on when my heart is set on another.

I sometimes wonder if he ever notices my stares, although I know he doesn't, if he had he wouldn't be so calm; he's not that discrete. I glance over only to see him typing away at the keyboard in an unlit room. Suspicious. I walk up behind him, a bit surprised that I was able; until I notice what it is he's so intent on. Me. My profile flickers over the screen and my heart flutters a bit as thoughts, hopes start to nag at my mind. I push them away and lean over his shoulder. "Are you so interested in me?" He starts, quickly shutting off the monitor. "I was even able to sneak up behind you." He blushes a bit. I love it when he does that. "Hi-Hiwatari-kun! When did you...?" I can see he notices the predatory look in my eyes, but I don't disguise it. I lean a bit closer my hand on his shoulder; I can feel his warmth through the thin shirt. "Niwa-kun!" Damn, that stupid girl. "A-ah! Harada-san!! You wanted to show me something, ne? So-sorry Hiwatari-kun, but I have to go." He flies across the room in a glance. Baka, what did he think I'd do, stop him? Tempting, but no.

When he goes I turn back to the computer, settling down in the seat. I can still feel the warmth were he sat. I flip the monitor back on and carefully scroll through the page. He hacked almost all my information, almost all. I read a few lines briefly, a few pieces of my life laid out before me. Some might feel pride or accomplishment. I flicked the computer off.

Carefully I think of a plan. I have to get him alone, get back to my goal. There can be no more distractions, not when HE'S getting stronger, there isn't anymore time. I wait till I see him making his way through the hall, his shoulders are slumped and it's obvious that something is wrong...but no, I can't afford to care about him. I stepped out, having timed it perfectly, and we collide, sending him to the floor along with the many trays I held. "Ah! Gomen!" He looks up, but I refuse to meet his eyes. Typically he offers to help carry the trays, his natural kindness allowing nothing less. I smile a bit, for I'd counted on that kindness, it was most surely be his undoing.

We enter the metal room, cold air hitting me like a bullet. I walk carefully over and set the trays down. "Wah! It's really cold in here!" I smile. "It's –20° Celsius." I hear the faint sound of the door as it scrapes shut, but make no move to stop it. The thud of finality rings in our ears. "Ah! The door!" I rush over, "It must have automatically locked somehow." I feign surprise, and pretend not to watch as he tries the entry code. I already know it won't work. "Seems we're trapped in here. No one comes down this late in the day." I walk away from the door calmly.

"Maybe we should run around, you know, so that we warm up our bodies." I shake my head. "Breathing the cold air will make it more painful." Time to kick the plan into motion, "I'm sure Kaitou Dark would be able to escape." He starts, "What...?" I just smile a little, "Nothing, just a thought." Now he'll have no choice but to transform and save us then...pain blossoms in my chest and I fall hard against the wall. No! Not at a time like this! I crumple to the floor and can hear him scooting closer, "Hiwatari-kun!" Damn it! Why now?! "Are you alright?" When the pain subsides I realize I'm lying in his lap and I can't help but breathe in his fresh scent. Of all times...I push away. "He, I'm sorry you had to see me in such an embarrassing state..." I fall back against the cold iron door. It felt better being against his warm body.

I take slow, even breaths and suddenly realize his arms are around me still. My pulse quickens at our close proximities. He wants to stay like this longer? Time slowly passes and his grip lessens. "Hey, Hiwatari-kun? Why did you come to our school?" What? Oh, yes. He read my profile. I smile a bit inside. Heh, no one had ever asked me that and I can't help but answer. "I suppose I just wanted to see what it was like to be a normal 14 year old boy." Normal, did that word really exist? I bite back a pang of regret as his arms leave me. He smiles, leaning against his knees, as I am, and shuts his eyes. "I'm glad." My heart begins to thump loudly. He looks so...(beautiful, sweet, charming?)...Innocent. "I'm also sort of relieved." I can't help the heat that's beginning to build up in my face. NO!! I throw him away from me, not even knowing my own actions. "NO! I don't need friends!" I glare at him in desperation and anger. "Especially not with you!" I can't let these emotions control me, I can't! His pained look goes strait to my heart, making me feel as I my gut was ripped out. "Did I do something wrong?" You fool! Why must you ALWAYS blame yourself? Doesn't he know he can do nothing wrong? It's Krad you fool, or... "Don't you know?" He looks at me blankly "Know?" Then the pain returns, harder than ever.

Pain ripples through in waves and I yell at him to stay back, to not help me as I feel my control slipping away. I feel Krad's anger, his hatred and jealousy, but I also know his desperation. His feelings for his other self that have turned into this bitter rivalry, this deep hatred; his feelings of inadequacy and thirst for acknowledgement. Then all goes fuzzy and I try hard to regain my control. This is my body damn it and I'm not going to let you take it! Suddenly I notice his intent just as Dark is unprepared, unwilling. No, I'm not going to let him destroy Dark, for if that happened then Daisuke would also..."No! This is my body!" His power falters and we struggle for a few more moments before he relinquishes, this time. Blackness seeps in.

When I awake I'm forced to consider many things. I cannot let this happen again I know. People are curious as to what happened in that storage room and I hear Daisuke was carried away, unconscious. I cannot let this happen again and so I prepare another plan, a plan of a different sort.

The next day I'm standing before Daisuke, asking if he wants a ride. He agrees with an uneasy smile, but there is no contempt. He forgives so easily, this boy. "I suppose this is goodbye for now." He looks so startled. "There is something I must do that requires me to leave." I can barely look at him as I speak these words, for I know that feelings are blossoming in him as well, but I can't let those be. How could we, two mortal enemies, be happy together? Would it turn out the same as Krad and Dark Mousy? I could never let that happen, so I'll leave. It's the best way; to let us both sort out our lives. I know that he already is stuck in a love triangle and adding our new emotions to the equation would be too much. So this is sayonara, until we have sorted through this more. Until he has forgotten these feelings that I see beginning to shine in his eyes, because I can stand having these feelings and still betraying them to catch him, but I can't stand betraying them when I know he feels the same for me, when I can see tenderness in is eyes. So sayonara, for now. "We'll meet again." The window snaps shut and I close my eyes leaning my head against the seat in exhaustion.

~Ratt-san~

Author's Note: _Haha, and so I actually make another DN Angel ficlet! ^^ Hmm, a bit melancholy yes, but Stage 4 has so much innuendo that I can't help myself and I though it fit Hiwatari-kun. Perhaps I'll make a follow up to this latter on, when I re-watch some more episodes, because I DO want he and Daisuke-chan to be together ^_~ Yosh!! Ne, I just hope Dark-san doesn't kill me for putting a little bit of Krad/Dark, or worse, Krad kill me. 0_0...*gulp*_


End file.
